Life

Why I Finally Believe That You Can Be 'Just Friends'

I had never truly believed there could be pure and disinterested friendship from a guy and a girl.

Until, after i was 19, I began college and located myself in a mostly male-populated course. And that i mean 1:5 female:male ratio. I will not blabber about how exactly wonderful it was to be in a higher male populated atmosphere, but it was. And the best part is that, although I didn't meet anyone I had been thinking about romantically, I met a lot of guys who became my friends, and something particularly became certainly one of my best friends.

I understand what you're considering: friendzone. Nope, truly, it had not been. Frank and that i at first did not really get along, and we actually tried to avoid talking to one another. However, living close to each other and spending time with the same people, we started to spend more and much more time together, texting each other every single day, likely to and from classes together and talking about everything. People thought i was together, but there's never been anything romantic between the two people. A minimum of for me personally, and i am pretty sure for him too.

Being in high density testosterone classes helped me see men in an entirely different way: they're just like us! No seriously, they're. Some of them might have jerky and childish views about sex and relationships, most are assholes, but many males are much like girls.

You have to know this about me: people prefer to tell me their things. And I barely need to ask. They just start pouring their souls to me. And that i love which i inspire so much rely upon them (but that is another topic). So I became their confidant. Even though it might happen to be weird sometimes, being “one from the guys” was awesome. I listened to their mental trips, their paranoia, their fears about girls and dating, I helped them answer texts, analyze them, I listened regarding their broken hearts, about the cheating girlfriend who ruined their trust however they still loved, their insecurities about the girl they liked but was sending them mixed signals, and the one they thought was from their league. And that i learned that they're much like us, if not even worse! I over analyze EVERYTHING in rapport, however, many of these outdid me. Whether it were a race: they'd be Usain Bolt, and I would be-me, aka the slowest being on Earth.

I'm still friends with those guys, and while with some of these there may happen to be something vaguely romantic at some point, with Frank there wasn't. We still see one another at least two times per month, we take long walks together, we text weekly. When I have to vent to a person concerning the crappy people or boyfriends of my entire life I text him or speak with him (or pass screenshot to him). And he will not do that because he's in a great relationship with a great girl that we ADORE.

A girlfriend of mine wondered why Frank's girlfriend wasn't jealous and felt okay with me and her boyfriend visiting the movies or dinner together and usually chilling out.

I think it's because she's smart enough to realize I am not a threat: I am not going to seduce her boyfriend, and let's face it, if nothing happened in 6 years, it should be not going to happen.

But I believe the most important thing is that HE's reassuring: he's sensible and sensitive enough to reassure his girlfriend about his feelings on her as well as for me, he's honest about our friendship, doesn't hide everything from her, and in all likelihood informed her which i like her almost more than I love him (just kidding, Frank! actually, no I'm not).

So, the thing I needed to say was: friendship between women and men IS possible, using the right people. And when you will find the right partners, it's not going to ever be difficult. Believe me.

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